Teachable Tuesday|Going With the Flow

This week’s teachable moment came last week during one of my Life Coaching classes. We were using cards as conversation pieces and two of the cards I was prompted to speak about related to “going with the flow”. One was in general and the other specifically related to relationships. As I analyzed the pictures on the cards with the words “going with the flow” several things came to me. First it was confirmation. I realized how far I’ve come in the past couple of years. Going with the flow were the last words anyone who knew me would use to describe me. I had this need to be in control of all things at all times. I wanted things to go my way just the way I planned them. I was a an overbearing perfectionist with unrealistic expectations of myself and others.

It took a lot of effort to let go of my perfectionist ways. It was hard to transition and accept not being in control. Once I stopped fighting it and began to experience the benefits, I realized how much harder it had been to go through life trying to control everything. It was exhausting! I was always coming up with plans and solutions to scenarios and worrying about things that usually didn’t even come to pass. I thought by not planning I wasn’t prepared and somehow my life would be turned upside down with this unexpected negative situation I wouldn’t have a plan in place to deal with. It’s been several years since I’ve stopped trying to control every aspect of my life and even though there have been a few unexpected circumstances (less than ideal ones) I’ve still found ways to move forward with my life in a positive way.

The other thing I realized is that those prompts were reminders. Reminders that I am only in control of myself. I’m responsible for the way that I act and react to things. I’m in control of my thoughts and emotions. I can’t control others nor their actions or reactions to things. Sometimes the best thing that I can do is put my best foot forward without any expectations. I can’t anticipate how people will handle situations or expect them to react in a certain way. This allows for a more healthy relationship no matter who it’s with. I’m not holding them to any particular standard or expectation and they aren’t failing a test they didn’t even realize they were taking. I allow things to unfold naturally and embrace the experience.

To me going with the flow means waking up everyday with the intention of making it a great one. Going through the day with a positive outlook and attitude and equipping yourself to deal with things as they come. Not constantly thinking about what could go wrong and when. Not trying to control your environment or those around you. Looking for the best in people and yourself. Accepting yourself and others for who you are and where you are. It means enjoying the little things. Going with the flow is about knowing there’s a destination and enjoying the journey along the way.


You might enjoy this post on tolerance.

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What are your thoughts on this post? What does going with the flow mean to you? Do you tend to go with the flow? Is it easy for you to go with the flow or do you tend to swim against the current? What benefits have you experienced by going with the flow? I’d love to hear your thoughts on this, please feel free to share in the comments section!

22 Replies to “Teachable Tuesday|Going With the Flow”

      1. I’ve always been laid back and more or less gone with the flow. Sure I like things to go right, but right now is a stressful time. I know it happens but I still don’t like it. ☺

        Liked by 1 person

  1. I used to be the same way. I learned a long time ago to just go with the flow. It feels better. I have learned to live for the day. It’s had for me to plan or stick to a schedule or routine because I usually end up disappointed.
    Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It does feel better. I had to ease into it by coming up with tentative plans but not letting myself get so disappointed when things didn’t turn out. I’m better with routines than schedules because with the kids we tend to do certain things in an order that makes sense but not being tied to the time takes the pressure off 🙂 Thanks for reading!


  2. Your eflected my younger years views. Now at my age with lots of fighting and experience I learned to go with the flow, a life without stress. Now Just as Buddha said ‘remove I and want………’

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Even though I’m like you and a bit of a perfectionist and like to stay in control, I’m also pretty good at going with the flow. I try to remind myself to just have faith in the fact that everything that’s meant to happen to me will happen. Every now and then I freak out over the fact that I’m not in control, but when that happens, I try to remember that it’s just not possible to control everything in life. Like I said: what’s meant to be is meant to be, and it will find a way!
    Great post!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah I’ve learned to let go over the past few years and life has gotten a whole lot easier! I’m learning to think positive and create a better tomorrow with the things I do today and just go with the flow because it’s so much easier than swimming upstream 😉 I’m glad that you’ve found the balance and a way to bring your focus back when you have a moment. Thanks for reading 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Excellent reminder! I’ve always wanted to be in control of everything too, but recently I’ve been trying to just accept things the way they happen. Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes, things will go well, but other times they won’t, and those will just be learning lessons.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. I tend to have a hard time going with the flow lol. I am a little bit of a control freak and sometimes yet too high of expectations for other people. Often, I will plan something and set such unrealistic outcomes I tend to be disappointed in the results, even if the time spent was still great. I worry about everything and am really trying to work on not micromanaging SO much! Thank you for being so honest in all your posts; its nice to see other people deal with similar struggles :).

    Liked by 1 person

    1. That can be really frustrating. How can you find balance? Is there a way to have a game plan and measure the results in a different way?

      Yeah, this isn’t a place to hide or fluff. Sometimes we struggle and sometimes we soar. It’s about learning how the struggle helps us soar!

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Balance is probably key…gonna have to work on that ;). At least realizing I do it may cause for less expectation later down the road? Hopefully 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

      2. Yes, awareness is the first part of the process. Now that you’ve shared it with someone else, it will help you to be more mindful. Be patient and gentle with yourself. It will take time for you to find the balance but practice makes progress! Every time you find yourself in that situation it’s a chance to practice. Sometimes you won’t realize it until afterwards and just have to say, “well, I see how I did it again, I’ll make a mental note to remember going into it next time so I do better!”.

        Liked by 1 person

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